Mom Bod Malfunctions: Unplanned Surgeries and Other Postpartum Plot Twists

If losing my last 15 lbs and fitting back into size 4 pants wasn’t already a formidable enough challenge, my doctor just informed me I now need surgery to repair an umbilical hernia that contains not just fat, but also some of my intestine. Cool. Cool. Just what I needed.

I mean, vomiting for nine hours straight post-delivery, coming this close to a stroke in the days that followed, getting hit by a distracted driver and having my van totalled with my kids inside (hello, whiplash), dealing with costochondritis, and managing a janky core plus four inches of abdominal separation—none of that was on my postpartum bingo card either.

My baby is thriving, and I feel well mood-wise. But I feel like my body is really not kicking ass in this round of advanced maternal age motherhood, and honestly, I’m bummed. I’ve been taking the vitamins, exercising, eating my own placenta (yeah, I'm that weirdo), and yet… I just can’t seem to win. I want to be strong physically and mentally, and feel like myself again.

I'm also struggling with giving myself permission to focus on my body, mind, and spirit instead of pouring everything into my kids. Intuitively, I know this is better than letting resentment take over. After my son was born, it took me 2.5 years to really remember myself and pay attention to my own needs and desires. But now I know better—I know the hidden costs. These days, neglecting those parts of myself feels like slow death. So even if it means prioritizing my well-being a bit more over other things, it must be done. My kids will thank me later.

On with it, then.