Sometimes the beauty in life is hard to find, but I want you to find it.

My son tells me that out of all the elements, I remind him of Earth the most.

“Why,” I ask.

“Because you love the Earth so much, mama.”

He’s right. I do. And I lose sleep over what living here might look like for my children one day. The hallmarks of late capitalism being ecocide and genocide, and all the while most of us remain distracted. Post-apocalyptic nightmares often plague my nights. The lingering sense of unease I feel is only tempered by the joy of being in the present moment and the small things we can do to instill a reverence for this place. Teach them to appreciate what we have now. Teach them to want to save it.

We spend our days observing caterpillars and roly polies. We smell flowers, and run our hands down inosculated trees. He calls them “tree parties”. We imagine the secrets their branches whisper back and forth each night when the forest is quiet and absent human life.

Sometimes I wonder if I should be focusing on other things. Like politeness or table manners. Instead, he knows about capitalism and billionaires and how they represent what ills us.

If this is how he remembers me… as a silly yet socially attuned mother who loved the Earth, then I’m okay with that.

Amid all the ugliness that pervades this world, I’ve always promised myself that my children and I will always find the truth and the beauty. And we will be part of what makes it so.